the brackets on facebook seem not symmetrical: an ‘interview’ with crispin best

Crispin Best is the editor/creator of ‘For Every Year,’ a literary site that has been publishing stories and poems in honor of every year since 1400, the year of Chaucer’s death. To date, more than 200 works have been published. Crispin and I are also facebook friends. I recently ‘interviewed’ him over Facebook chat. Crispin lives in London and blogs here

frances dinger: hey crispin, i was wondering if you had a publishing schedule for the next few years in for every year. I’m working on 1610 and was just wondering when you’d like to have it done and sent to you
crispin best: ahhhhhhh dinger babe
things are slow at the moment because no-one has claimed 1602
i guess you might have a month or something, but if someone comes through with other years, it could be a couple of weeks
fd: okay, cool
cb: call it a 2/3wks and i ‘ll let you know if anything’s suddenly approaching? is that legit, hammer?
fd: damn, i’m surprised no one has 1602. the oxford library opened that year, shakespeare put on 12th night, there was a faminine in russia… yeah, that sounds legit, man
thanks
cb: faminine is ‘lack of females’
fd: ha, word.
cb: gettin’ slizzard
fd: urbandictionary.com says slizzard is a ‘dirty south’ term for getting intoxicated. when i think of crispin best, the words ‘dirty’ and ‘south’ do not come to mind.
cb: never catch me ridin’ durty
Chamillionaire, is an American rapper, singer, philanthropist, and CEO of Chamillitary Entertainment.
fd: can he also change color to match his environment?
cb: dinger: literalbabe extraordinaire
fd: new facebook status
cb: haha
feel honoured
on the honour roll
honour roll = on a roll
does such a thing as ‘honour/-or roll’ exist? seems funny if i just imagined it
i think it exists
fd: i think we had the honor roll in elementary school/middle school. children like to feel honored and appreciated.
cb: crispin likes to feel honoured and appreciated
do you have a sense (inherently?) of ‘british spellings’ as being ~dumb/~wrong at all?
fd: no. i like to spell it ‘theatre’ in reference to the kind with a stage and I say ‘grey’ instead of ‘gray.’
cb: i am proud of you
fd: though i think i have an inherent sense that the ‘u’ in ‘honour’ feels superfluous. i don’t know. it’s an efficiency thing, maybe.
that tenth of a second means a lot
cb: totally superfluous, but so is that last u in superfluous, maybe
fd: ooh, word
cb: but no, i agree…. i feel dumb typing “colour” to a ~’yank’
but otherwise feels too much like ‘colon’
immediately just think of brown
as being ‘colour of anus’ and also ‘sad (paint) mixture of all other colours’
fd: hahaha re: sad paint
cb: poor sad paint
feel bad for it
seemed funny to poke you just then
‘poke’
fd: my mom is the only person who pokes me
cb: there are two [females] that poke me
don’t understand their motivations at all
both w/ ‘steady boyfs’
fd: does that make you feel ‘honoured’ and appreciated?

cb: it makes me think ‘what is happening why are we poking each other
it’s just as easy to poke back as it is to remove poke
so i tend to ‘instinctively’ poke back
the alternative seems negative and brown
damn – seems ‘veering into racism’
will stop using ‘brown’ pejoratively
fd: can you think of any one artist/writer/person celestial being who has ‘influenced’ your use of scare quotes?
cb: no
i think i saw chris killen use them first
i have used them maybe ‘incessantly’ (particularly regularly, it seems, on adverbs… ((though not on either of those just there, it seems))) since then
do you place yourself ‘in opposition’ to their use? i sort of ‘totally ignore’ the fact that they seem [forced/copycat/alienating/~embarrasssing(?)] to many people
fd: i think i ‘like’ scare quotes for the same reason i like cormac mcarthy’s lack of punctuation. it’s a ‘stylistic’ choice
we are ‘artists’
cb: (damn – washed my pillow cases. trying to remember which one was ‘my fave pillow’ in order to place ‘my fave pillow case ((f/ zoo theme)) on it)
you are an artist. i am a schmuck. i am glad you like stylistic choices. you are a good hero to have
fd: what is your pillow preference? firm or soft?
cb: think i like ‘a single ~large/chunky, medium-soft pillow’. you?
fd: i like to have 2-3 medium soft pillows so i can arrange them around me like a nest
i think there are five pillows on my bed right now\
my parent’s cat insists on sleeping on two stacked pillows
*parents’
cb: i think that’s ~exactly what i would have guessed re: 2-3 medium soft
wish i would have been a smartass and ‘preempted’ you
fd: do i seem like the ‘type’ of girl that would have 2-3 medium soft pillows? what does that say about my character/’morals’?
cb: i remember being a ~14-16yr old kid, and spending my entire time trying to convince people i ‘understood’ their characters via ‘broad and wild dismissive generalisations’ about their character and morals
what a rotten lad
fd: did this cause you to lose/gain friends?]
cb: maybe caused me to have a [steady amount] of friends
unsure what behaviours i would have replaced those behaviours with, and their respective levels of ‘abilities to garner/lose me friends’
think i was pretty good at it by the end. had ‘good/convincing’ ~psychobabble vocabulary
and managed to make ‘broad, scripted, ~shocking statements/generalisations about myself’ which seemed to function to [disarm/amuse/’inspire {quasi/teenage} awe in’] the other person
damn punctuation
fd: i have never seen anyone use {} in facechat
cb: they seem ‘non-equivalent’
{}*
fb need to look into that
:putnam: putnam needs to sort that out
hope putnam gets an email every time someone uses his face as an emoticon (also have you had any behaviours [in your lifetime] that you would like to share with me at this point, dinger?)
fd: what kind of behaviours/ors?
cb: dunno – just i feel like i described a ‘3.8/10 interesting’ behaviour i had, felt interested in behaviours of dinger
perhaps there are no behaviours
soz
fd: umm… has richard told you i used to be a larper?
cb: oh sweet
no
nice behaviour
what did you larp? civil war things?
fd: like fantasy/medeival things. i was a sixth level ‘wizard’ and also a ‘page’ to a ‘squire’
it was not a historically accurate larp
cb: oh sweet
fd: we unironically shouted ‘huzzah!’ at celebrations
cb: makes me feel confident and nice when i hear about people being unselfconscious and ‘able to enjoy experiences w/out [fear/superiority/queasiness]
jzs [ and ] are not equivalent either: []
what is facebook ‘on’?
fd: maybe they are trying to be ‘edgy’ with asymmetrical [] {}
cb: brackets = literally edgy, literalbabe
fd: loled for probably 30 seconds straight
cb: fucken sweet. can’t wait to someday meet an awesome literalbabe who likes my humours
fd: humours: choleric, sanguine, melancholy, phlegmatic
cb: aristotle? when i talk with my friends from london, i speak with a glottal stop
hippocrates = sweet guy
damn someone just linked me to a jason derulo video
watching jason derulo video
alright – night, dawg. look forward to reading what you come up with
zomgxoxo
fd: night, dude

*The non-equivalence of {} and [] did not carry over into wordpress.

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